Doctor: "Okay now wiggle your toes."
Me: "Ow." (three toes move)
Doctor: "Okay, now flex your foot to the left."
Me: "Okay. Ow."
Doctor: "You can start."
Me: "I am."
Doctor: "Oh."
Yes, that is a picture of my right foot. Yes, that is a Tensor bandage. And yes, those are my Hello Kitty PJs.
Long story short, yesterday I fell down and sprained my ankle...badly.
Nothing's broken, but I've done quite the job on both ligaments that run in the ankle mechanism: six weeks recovery is booked on my calendar. The exbf lent me one of his walking sticks and gave me some tips:
- Don't leave it in a path -- accidents and all that.
- If you need to use both hands, hook it like *this.*
- Use it to push the automatic door buttons, so they open up without you having to push/pull it.
- When you walk, don't follow House's example.
Here's what I learned about the walking stick in my first day:
- I can poke people with it.
- I can use it to trip the motion sensor in the elevator so the doors don't close on me.
- I can use the hooky end to pull things off of high shelves.
- My arm gets sore quickly.
- When going upstairs (at home), it's easiest and fastest to not use the walking stick but to crawl on all fours.
- When going downstairs (at home), it's easiest and fastest to use the walking stick (bumming it down is fast but I bump my foot too much).
- I can poke people with it.
- I can hook people with it (Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you *hook*)
- People don't like to stand within cane's reach of me.
- I can use it as a scepter.
I must admit that I was pretty foolish today and tried hobbling around...my ego convinced me to over-exert myself...am in quite a bit of pain now.
I now have to rethink my entire April--cancelled my next yoga class (was to start next week); re-org the next road trip (The Fussy Eater has offered to take care of train fare and accommodations so I don't have to drive long distances in one day); most of my cooking plans are on hold (I'll see if I can participate in Tigers & Strawberries's blogging event which was also to be this month's cardmom post) including the batch of cookies I've been craving, Easter supper, my workaversary treats, the vanilla recipe, dinner.
Waah.
Did I mention it's my accelerator foot? I should also mention that it's my braking foot too.
Stories are circulating as to how I did it -- including "bashing an ATM" because it wouldn't let me choose the $20 option ($60, $80, $100--yes, but $20? no) and one mentioned by my MostMarvellousManager "Well, yeah, I set the bar too high and she couldn't clear it." I asked him if he minded if I used him as the scapegoat: he laughed and said he didn't mind.
So now I'm on a mission to devise a plausible, yet implausible story a la Frying Pan Alley.
The other bright side is I'm using it as a shopping opportunity. Although I appreciate the loan of the cane, it is one of his family heirlooms and I would never forgive myself if I lost it...so I am bound and determined to get myself a funky, swanky yet somewhat ominous walking stick of my own. Hmmm...must remember that it should have a high pokeability rating...and that bayonette-like ice adaptor.
Ow,
jasmine
Timmys count temporarily suspended.
14 comments:
good luck getting around! I love the PJs!
So, tell me, honestly, how many people have you hit with it out of frustration?
Hope you're better soon. You should have opted for one of those Rascal scooters.
You poor thing! I hope your feet is feeling better very very soon. In the meantime ... keep poking people! That's funny!
Jasmine!!! I hope are you back to normal soon. I will be thinking of you.
Aw, sorry to hear about your little accident. Hope you'll get well soon :)
Thanks in advance for doing the tag !
Hello all
Thanks for all your kind thoughts:)
Rachel -- the pjs are incredibly comfy :)
Mochene -- No one's been hit out of frustration...they're all outside of cane reach! WRT scooters...can I have both the cane and the scooter? that way I can do the drive-by poking thing.
Ivonne -- The Fussy Eater read your comment and said NO. As he's already been poked, he does not recommend me keep the habit...
Heather--Thanks :)
Strawberry -- Thanks and not a problem. I'll try and get to it this weekend or early next week...
Mwah, I came by and left appropriately obnoxious well-wishes, but alas, someone else must have received them.
So, to revisit, it was something along the lines of now feeling slightly less jealous about missing The Big Brunch, followed by winks and nudges, and just jokings. This was all topped off with a very polite "please get better soon" and a reminder that poking cures all manner of ill (I should know, I indulge frequently, despite the lack of a cane). Oh yes, and some babble about you now having more time for letters to Timmies. All the above being far more eloquent the first time round, of course.
Hope you feel better soon, Jasmine. Nice toesies!
Poor Jasmine! But your pj's are fabulous.
Jasmine, you poor girl! How awful!
I have to admit, though, I giggled at the image of you stumping around like dear Dr. House.
Rest. Take care of yourself. Accept being pampered. And get better!!
Hello :)
RS--you are the second person to tell me that they've posted a comment that has mysteriously disappeared. Hmmm...I blame Tims :) Thanks...I love that shade of pink.
Rorie--if you have to be in one spot, then you have to be comfy...Hello Kitty PJs are comfy.
Tania--I'm trying to be good about not doing everything myself...I'm not very good at it, but I'm trying :)
j
Oh Jasmine, I hope you are feeling better now... (love the pjs and pink nails ;)) Take care and get better soon.
hope your foot is better now!!
Sorry it's me again - just wanted to ask if House is popular there? :) I really like him (he's done lots of great comedy series here) but I think his American accent is pretty bad...
Hi again
Kat--it's almost better but every once in a while it does twinge.
Keiko--House is incredibly popular over in North America. I think it's one of the top-rated shows...which means Rupert and his minions may try and have their way with it (sigh). I actually don't mind his American accent--I think it's quite good--and quite a contrast to his normal voice. I too am a great fan of his (and Stephen Fry) for years and years. I first came across them in either Blackadder or Jeeves, but Canada ran A Bit of Fry and Laurie as well. Then again there are their wonderful books :)
j
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