30 July 2007

My Darling One. My Love.

My Darling One. My Love.

Michael, here known as The Fussy Eater, passed away on Thursday 26 July 2007. It was sudden and totally unexpected. He was 40 years old.

He was my biggest fan, my most ardent supporter, and he loved me unconditionally. He was so giving, so kind, and so good to me. I don't know what I did to deserve having such a wonderful person's life intertwine with mine. We re-connected more than three years ago, and have been inseparable ever since. Until now.

I miss you so much. I hope you know how much I love you.

jasmine

A very special thank you to Alanna, Birdie, Elisa, Elise, Heather, Jeannie and Aaron, Jory, Kalyn, Ruth, Shuna, Susan and everyone else at BlogHer who in their own ways helped me this past weekend.

To my readers: I need some time, and I don't know how much. I hope you understand.

98 comments:

Katerina said...

I am so so sorry to hear that. All the best to you and your family.

K & S said...

I'm so sorry to hear, deepest sympathies to you and your family.

shuna fish lydon said...

Jasmine,

What an honor to meet you this weekend in Chicago. I am so sorry for your loss and grief.

I know this: the gift of love never ceases to give and nourish.

sending you love and courage.

Shuna

MyKitchenInHalfCups said...

Oh Jasmine,
Of course you need time.
Hugs my friend.
All you need. Time and Hugs.

Lydia said...

My heart goes out to you.

Lis said...

I am so sorry for your loss, Jasmine. I can't even imagine what you are going through.. I wish I could help in any way possible!

You take as much time as you need.. this is all about you now - focus on the wonderful memories you shared with him, for you will always have him near in your heart.

xoxo

Rachel said...

How awful. Take all the time you need. You are in my thoughts.

breadchick said...

Jasmine, I am so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Take as much time as you need. Your Daring Baker family will keep the light on for you.

Tartelette said...

Oh Jasmine, I am so sorry. My heart is really hurting for you now. If only I could take away your pain. Sincerey. All my thoughts go out to you, yours and his family.

Andrea said...

Jasmine, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. Best wishes.

Ivonne said...

Jasmine,

My thoughts are with you. I'm sending you a huge hug. Take care of yourself.

sunita said...

My heartfelt condolences to you...cherish the wonderful memories that you two had together and it will give you the strength to carry on.

Heather said...

Jasmine,
I am so sorry.

Cheryl said...

I so terribly sorry for your loss. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Patricia Scarpin said...

I am so sorry for your loss.

veuveclicquot said...

Jasmine,

So sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts are with you and your family.

Jes said...

You are definitely in my prayers. My boyfriend died last summer and I know how hard it is to lose someone you love. ((hugs))

Dharm said...

Jasmine,
I am so sorry for your loss. Take comfort and trust that there is a better place somewhere. Cherish the memories and remember that love never dies....

Jerry said...

Jasmine,
I am sorry to hear of your loss, your are in my thoughts.

Anita said...

Jasmine,
I'm so sorry to hear of this. My deepest condolences to you and best wishes.

Dagmar - A Cat in the Kitchen said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. My deepest sympathies to you and both your families.

Sara said...

Jasmine, I am so, so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Hilda said...

Jasmine, this is so terrible to read. I am so sorry for your loss. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you. My thoughts are with you.

Hilda

Claire said...

There is a family out here in the blogosphere, and they are all standing behind you now. It was an honor to meet you, and I am so very sorry for your loss.

Alice Q. said...

Oh Jasmine I'm so sorry. My heart goes out to you and I will be thinking about you - please take care of yourself!

Shaun said...

Jasmine, darling - Words never seem to be enough at a time like this, but I am sure that time will help. Many hugs for you as you work through this most harrowing of times. Lots of love.

Chubby Cheek Girls said...

Jasmine,

I'm so sorry for your loss.... My heartbreaks just to think of what you are going through. You are in my thoughts and prayers <3

-Linda

Deborah said...

Our hearts and prayers are with you.

Leslie said...

Jasmine, I am incredibly sorry for your loss. It is heartbreaking to have to go through this and it's not fair. :( You are in my thoughts.

Kalyn said...

Jasmine, what a lovely tribute to Michael. My heart just aches for you as I read it. I cannot even begin to express my admiration for your ability to still carry on at Blogher with the utmost dignity and courage. You're a remarkable person, and I'm so glad we got to meet. Please let me know if there is anything at all I can do that would be helpful. Just do whatever you need to do for yourself during this time, and the blog will still be there when you're ready to take it up again. Meanwhile I hope you can feel the love that the food blog community is extending you, and that you can take at least a small comfort in it.

Sarah Caron said...

Jasmine,

I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you. Take as much time as you need, and just know that when you are ready, your readers will be right here waiting for you.

Ilva said...

I'm so sorry hearing about your great loss. You are in my thoughts. Let it take the time it takes. We are here and we can wait a long time.

Holly Dart said...

Jasmine,

I am so very sorry. You are in my prayers.

holly

Shauna Loves Chocolate said...

I'm sorry you have to go through this. Take care.

SusanV said...

Jasmine, I know he was a wonderful person to be loved by someone like you. You are incredibly brave and strong, and I know that your love for each other will live on.

If there's ever anything I can do for you, please don't hesitate to call. My thoughts are with you.

Peabody said...

Take all the time in the world.
I'm so very sorry for your loss, I can't even imagine.
Peabody

Rose said...

Jasmine,
My dear, I am so sorry for your loss.

Marce said...

I´m terribly sorry for your loss. Take all the time you need to recover and cherish the time you had together and what he has taught you. *Hugs*

Kelly-Jane said...

Thinking of you sweetie big hugs (((( )))).

KJxx

Amy said...

Jasmine,
I'm so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you. Please take care of yourself.

Inne said...

So sorry for your loss, Jasmine. My deepest sympathy to you and both your families.

Amanda at Little Foodies said...

So sorry to hear of your loss Jasmine. Take care of yourself.
with love, Amanda

Anh said...

Jasmine,

I am so sorry for your loss. I eish I could help you in any way... Please take care and I wish you all the best.

Anonymous said...

I don't know you but your words, your picture and your loss tugged severely at my heartstrings.
All my love, I can't think of anything else to say, so please accept my friendly silence.

Myrtille said...

It's hard to find the words...I'm so very sorry for your loss.You are in my thoughts.

Steph said...

I am so sorry to hear about your lost, my most heartfelt sympathies and prayers go out to you in the difficult time

Elle said...

There are no words truly, but I will keep you in my thoughts and send you a virtual hug. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Aimée said...

Jasmine,
What a shock to hear of your loss. I can only hope you are surrounded by loved ones who can support you during this difficult time.
You are in my prayers.

Aimee

Maman said...

I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your beloved.

Minko said...

Thinking of you.

I hope you take the time you need. Don't rush - the world and the people who care about you will still be there when you are ready.

ByTheBay said...

I don't know you, but I'm a reader of your blog - And I am so terribly sorry to hear this awful news. Sending good thoughts and prayers your way. Take your time, and do what you need to do - Put yourself first! We'll all still be here when you get back.

Anna said...

Jasmine, so sorry to hear this. I don't know you personally, but my heart goes out to you right now.

Meeta said...

Jasmine, my thoughts and prayers are with you. I am so very sorry to hear about your loss.

Chubby Cheek Girls said...

Jasmine,

I am extremely sorry for your loss. I can't begin to imagine the pain you must feel. Please know I am praying for you and your families.

Take all the time you need, when you come back we will be here with open arms.

-Michelle

Tana said...

Dear Jasmine:

Take heart in the heart you have, which loved.

Take heart, in the heart he had, which loved.

Take heart in having known such love, and such companionship, and such joy.

Take heart in knowing that the love you gave means that you are worthy of, capable of, and meaning to, love.

Love finds love. Not now: but carry that knowledge that you are, from all you show, made of the kind of love that will continue.

If I may be so bold, I would ask you to read something about grief that I wrote when my dear friend's little boy died. He was three, and his name, to me, was "Gaby Baby." And then I wrote this: "Grief, My Friend."

Take your time, and do what you need to do, but do not let your center collapse, because love is about planting seeds and enjoying the harvest.

Even grief is a good harvest: Jasmine, you have loved.

Pille said...

So sorry about this, Jasmine. My condolences...

Freya and Paul said...

I think Kalyn summed it up most succinctly. We are all thinking of you and we are so terribly sorry for your loss.

Diane said...

Oh Jasmine, I am so sorry. He has a kind face and looks like someone who would be nice to know. At least you were able to reconnect, however briefly. And love is always a gift however long one has it.

My heart goes out to you. Peace.

Nicole said...

Jasmine,

My thoughts have been with you since we met last weekend. Take the time you need, we will all be here for you when you are ready to return. I know that the conference was terribly difficult for you but I want you to know that I learned so much from you during the foodblogging session. Take care Jasmine.

Nicole

Jenny said...

Jasmine- I only know of you through the Daring Bakers, but I am devastated for you. My thoughts go with you and your family.
Jenny

farmgirl said...

I'm so very, very sorry. Thank you for sharing this wonderful photo of the two of you with us.

Kung Foodie Kat said...

My heart, thoughts, and well wishes are with you. You handled the weekend with such grace, I feel blessed to have met you.

jenjen said...

My thoughts and prayers go out to you. I hope that in this time you will find peace and some joy. Take as much time as you need.

Gemma said...

Jasmine, I am so truly sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you. Gemma x

leonine194 said...

oh i'm so sorry! my condolences!

Kristen said...

I am so very sorry. You'll be in my thoughts.

the pastry princess said...

i'm am so sorry to hear of your loss, jasmine. my prayers are with you and may you have many hugs and sympathies whenever you need them...

Belinda said...

I'm so terribly sorry. God bless you and give you strength to get through this huge loss.

Judy said...

My deepest sympathies for your loss. Unconditional love is something to be cherished forever.

Karina Allrich said...

Dear Jasmine,

I am so sorry for your loss. May you find comfort and peace surrounding you and supporting you during this terrible time.

Karina

Blue Plate said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. My deepest sympathies.

gilly said...

I'm so sorry for your loss Jasmine... my thoughts are with you...

bee said...

wish you strength, peace and calm, jasmine, during this tragic time. hugs to you.

Anonymous said...

I am very very sorry for your loss.

Jerry said...

Jasmine,

I know I'm posting late, but was in the middle of a move and didn't get the news.

I know your pain, as I've been there myself on more than one occasion, I'll not say I'm sorry, as those words are meaningless, and painful after a bit in their own way. Instead I'll leave you with a thought from my ancestors.

Don't grieve for me, for now I'm free!
I follow the plan God laid for me.
I saw His face, I heard His call,
I took His hand and left it all...
I could not stay another day,
To love, to laugh, to work or play;
Tasks left undone must stay that way.
And if my parting has left a void,
Then fill it with remembered joy.
A friendship shared, a laugh, a kiss...
Ah yes, these things I, too, shall miss.
My life's been full, I've savoured much:
Good times, good friends, a loved-one's touch.
Perhaps my time seemed all too brief—
Don't shorten yours with undue grief.
Be not burdened with tears of sorrow,
Enjoy the sunshine of the morrow.

CollyWolly said...

Jasmine Honey, I always stop by and read your blog when I get the chance and was so sad to read your post about the death of your beloved. The poem above that Jerry wrote is so lovely and very meaningful and will one day help you after your grieving is done. Take your time, allow yourself to go through all the stages to become whole once again, with a heart full of wonderful memories. Your bloggie family loves you, it is clear from all the outpouring of sadness and caring in the comments posted. Someone told me this - "It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all". I am praying for you sweetie, wish I could wrap my arms around you now and just hold you and cry with you. Colleen in SA

bea at la tartine gourmande said...

Jasmine,

As you already know, I send you all my love and support in this difficult life moment. I was so pleased to meet you in Chicago, and so sorry to hear this tragic news! Bon courage!

Culinarily Obsessed said...

Oh wow...Jasmine I'm so sorry to read this. My thoughts are with you and your loved ones. I hope you are doing well considering all that you are going through.

Lyra said...

I just found your blog a few weeks ago and was enchanted by your enthusiasm and witty writing. I am so sorry for your sudden loss. Please know that a lot of people out there in the internet world are keeping you in their thoughts.

cutie said...

There is never enough time with the ones we love....

I'm so sorry, Jas....

Sending you big lovin', hon.

C.

Sarah said...

Oh my goodness, I am so sorry to hear that... tons of hugs from my little kitchen...

Andaliman said...

It had been long time I didn't visit your blog. As I visited today, I'm so sorry to read this

Tam said...

So sorry for your loss... my thoughts and prayers are with you...

a reader in brooklyn said...

i am so sorry for your loss. my deepest sympathy to you and your family.

Meg said...

Jasmine - I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. My thoughts are with you and yours. I'm sending you cyber-hugs. Take care.

Anali said...

Jasmine - I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Take care.

Alice Q. said...

Hi Jasmine - I've been thinking about you and wanted to drop you a line. I'm so sorry to hear about your loss, I can only try to imagine what you are going through. Please take care of yourself and know that we are looking forward to your return. - Alice

Bake your cake and eat it too said...

I know this is the first time I've visited your blog, but I am truly sorry for your loss and the hurt and pain you are feeling. I know words aren't nearly enough, and it's tiring to hear that time will heal, so I won't say that. Just know everyones thoughts are with you, Take care.

kelli ann said...

dear jasmine: so sad to drop by and read of your loss. i send you my best wishes, and hope you can take all the time that you need...

Paz said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I'll be praying for peace of heart and peace of mind for you.

Big hug,
Paz

Jainaba said...

Hi Jasmine,

I have always been a lurker on your site and visited frequently but this time around, I had to write because two days after you lost your loved one, I lost my sister as well and like you it was totally unexpected. I am so sorry for your loss and will pray for you that God gives you the strength to heal and takes care of you and your family.

Leslie said...

Jasmine - just wanted you to know that you are in my thoughts. I wish you strength as you continue to work through this.

Teri said...

I came upon your blog while looking for something, now I can't even remember what, as reading your words upon the loss of your husband, just made me think back to February 22nd,when I lost my husband as unexpectedly. I don't even know how to blog, but a friend made a blogspot for Mike and though no one has posted anything in a while, it gives me comfort to read it from time to time, and realize over and over again how much he was loved. I was so lucky to have given him the chance to enter my life, I am a better person for having known him.

Warmest Thoughts,
Teri
Mike's blog is at http://mikememorial.blogspot.com/

Sam said...

Jasmine
I am sorry I missed writing you at the time it happened, I am so sorry this happened to you. My best teen friend just passed away at the age of 41 after a very short battle with cancer and I have learnt how hard death at this age can hit.
I am thinking of you

Sam

Anonymous said...

I am sorry this happened to you. Michael is in HEAVEN now watching over you.Take your time. We all thinking of you and praying for you.

Kathy

Kja said...

I'm really sorry for you. Take care.

Rachael said...

There really are no words. I am so sorry for your loss.

Collywolly said...

Thinking very special thoughts of you for tomorrow on the 2nd anniversary of Michaels death. Upholding you in my prayers. Hugs xxx