Daring Bakers: Chocolate Eclairs

Hello all -- As you've probably guessed by the very recent proliferation of chocolate éclairs, the Daring Bakers strike again. Meeta of What's For Lunch, Honey and Tony Tahan are to thank for these wonderfully easy and tasty treats.

Anyway, as is the norm, Beelzebub isn't to be trusted with items made from choux pastry, so I made them at my parents' house.

To read what the other DBs did with this challenge, take a meander through our blogroll.

As some of you know, my dear chicken-craving Beanie is now an only cat and lives with his Gramma and Grampa. He kept a very, very close eye on me and the treats that came out of the oven. He asked ever so nicely to write to you since it's been a very long time since he last appeared here, and he promised to talk about the challenge. How could I say "no" to that face?

Hallo all you luvly humman-cats

Did you miss me?

I missed you.

So much happened since I last writed to you. I know you know that my humman's humman went away forever to play in the big catnip field in the sky and now eats all the chicken he wants. My humman is doing okay. She misses him and I miss him too.

I used to come out and visit with him. The OTHER cats never bothered. That rotten little goody two shoes Hagia used to have long talks with him on the phone--making up lies and stories about me--but she he never seened her. I visited--but he never gave me any chicken. How could he not give me any chicken? I'm a very handsome cat and chicken only makes me handsomer.

You know that Jasmine and Hagia and Zeus no longer live with me. Did they tell you why? If they did, don't believe anything they say. I'll tell you what really happened.

When Jasmine decided to buy the condo she didn't know if she could afford to keep me (and the others). Gramma and Grampa decided they would take care of me (and the others). I love gramma. She give me treats like chicken and turkey and oatmeal and ice cream. She even sews toys for me. Gramma says that the treats and toys are for all of us, but I know she really means just me.

I missed my humman-cat when she was away. The others didn't. They don't luv her as much as I do. She visited almost every day --I memorized her schedule and waited for her every day at the same time. The others never came out. She had to go looking for them. She didn't have to look for me because I was right there.

Well, something happened and she found Hagia and Hagia said I wasn't letting her eat and Hagia said she was scared and made up all sorts of stories about me. Everyone always says how nice and good Hagia is and she's little Miss Purrfect. I know that she's not, but nobody believes me.And the next thing I know she went away.

I was sooo happy I gots more cuddles and more food and then Jasmine spended more time with me. I'm so smart!

Everything was good until a couple of months ago. I like to rassel and Zeus used to rassel with me, but he decided he didn't want to rassel. So I figured he just need more rasseling to remember how much he liked rasseling. But Grampa decided that enough was enough took Zeus away.

Gramma got so mad at me. She said it was my fault that Hagia and Zeus went away because of me. She then said that they went to live with Jasmine. That's not fair! I'm supposed to live with my humman-cat, not them.

But there is a good side to all of this. I get two human-cats instead of one and they both give me lots of cuddles and lots of treats. So I guess that's okay. Gramma likes to take naps and I nap with her. Papa likes to fix things so I help him. And Jasmine comes and visits a lot so I get to see her too.

The only bad thing is that they got this black chair and I like it--but Gramma can't see me when I'm on it so sometimes she sits on me. Grampa put a big gold towel on the chair so she doesn't sit on me again. Doesn't it make my eyes look pretty?

Anyway, I promised I would talk to you about the special treats Jasmine made. She called them éclaws or something. I watched her make them and they looked easy to make. Gramma doesn't have a piping bag so they filled a zippy bag with the dough and clipped corner. They made fat worms and round buttons with the dough.

When they came out of the oven they were big and poofy. They smelled good. I asked for some but she said "No, Beanie, these aren't for pussycats." She's so mean to me. Then she took them away and said she would "finish them."

Finish them? She's going to eat them all by herself? She's so greedy. Couldn't she have saved one for me?

I looked at Gramma and she said that they were for a special lunch the next day.

I'm special. I should get one.

Gramma and Grampa and their friends went to have lunch and came back and talked about the éclaws. They said that Jasmine filled them with vanilla pastry cream and put chocklit on top. One of the friends said that some of the chocklit was spicy because the chocklit had chilli peppers in it and the rest was just nice because it had matcha tea tea with it.

I don't know. I think they would have been better with chicken.

cheers!
jasmine

Settling in for a good, long soak

The other week my parents had some guests over for the weekend. In amongst the various plans and whotnots was the slightest sledgehammer of a hint to have them over at mine. Not being as dim as I could pretend to be I offered my place up for lunch.

"Oh, can you make dessert, then?" asked my Dear Little Cardamummy.

"Yeah, no problem but I'll bake at yours." Beelzebub is still as trustworthy as whichever politician who's causing the greatest grief in your life at the moment.

The day before I went over to make the cakes and the super secret DB August 08 Challenge, I arrived at theirs to hand over one of the giant courgettes my colleague made available.

"How are we going to have lunch?" she said.

"Well, we'll serve it on plates and eat." I responded.

She glared at me...that special Mummy glare that means "behave."

"Well, I'm making the dessert, so I thought you'd be bringing the rest." I said...feeling I was being set up.

"Oh, that's too much work," she said.

"Well, what do you want to do?"

"I want to make pork chops."

"Okay."

"You make such nice ribs," she said setting me up.

"Mmm-hmm."

"Are they difficult to make?"

"No. You just need the rub and the barbecue sauce," really feeling set up.

"Hmm."

"Do you want me to make the meat?"

"Oh, that would be a great help. Wow look at that zucchini--what do I do with that?"

"Well, you could make fritters--like your corn fritters, but with grated zucchini."

"Hmm...that's too hard."

"No it isn't"

"Yes it is...but they would be nice to have."

She blindsided me with that one.

"Do you want me to make them?"I asked (sighing on the inside, rolling my eyes on the outside).

"Oh yes. That would be good."

"Okay...but you're grating it." (it was the only victory I could claim).

For the next couple of days she asked about what I'd do with the pork chops, assuming I'd make them the same way as I did the ribs. At the last minute I changed my mind and decided to forego my ribby ways.

"So what are you going to do?"

"You'll see."

"Will it be good."

"It's always good."

"But what will you do?"

"You'll have to wait until Sunday to see."

My parents weren't happy with my responses, but then again, from whom else would I have learned such deflection and vaguaries?

The truth was, after going through Beyond The Great Wall, I was still in a mood for China-influenced cooking. I flipped through the book along with a few others, but doctored marinade found in Nigella's How To Eat (p443). She followed Dr. Jonathan Miller's lead and called it "char siuish" as it's not quite char siu, but instead inspired by Chinese barbecued or roasted pork.

The greatest departure from her marinade is my inclusion of orange marmelade for citrussy notes along with a bit of garlic and hot red chillies. The quantities I'm giving will fill a 400ml jar--there were a lot of porkchops--if you have unused marinade, it can be refrigerated.

I made the marinade the day before and let the chops soak in the flavours overnight. The verdict? Everyone liked it--and my dad is itching for the recipe...so consider yourselves blessed as you'll be getting it a few hours before him.

If Nigella's version was char siuish, mine is that much farther removed from the original inspiration...I suppose it could be called ishy char siuish.

Ishy char siusish marinade

90 ml hoisin sauce
60 ml soy sauce
60 ml black bean sauce
60 ml tomato ketchup
60 ml black rice vinegar
2 bulgey tablespoons runny honey
2 bulgey tablespoons orange marmelade
2-3 cloves minced garlic
1 thumb of grated ginger
2 minced hot red chillies
1/2 tsp sesame oil
1/2 tsp chilli oil


cheers!
jasmine

Milk Calendar Mondays: Chicken and Fresh Spinach Tortellini

Dare I say it?

This is the sort of thing the Milk Calendar people should be aiming for when developing and choosing recipes for their calendar.

You read right. Two passing grade recipes in a row. Who'da thunk it?

When you actually read this month's recipe for Chicken and Fresh Spinach Tortellini, you might easily figure out why it works: the dairy component (in this case milk) serves a real purpose. That is the milk is supposed to be there and substituting it for water or stock or wine would probably make the recipe worse.

Milk wasn't used to boil rice. Milk wasn't used as pasta water.

The milk was used for sauce. And not some wretched, bland and pallid imitation of what should have been a bold and flavourful coating. It was a sauce that worked well enough and easily adapted to the cook's preference.

In keeping with the calendar's raison d'être it is an extremely easy recipe. And in keeping with the other recipes, it is designed so as to not offend Canadian's stereotypically timid tastebuds. The "adventurous" additions really aren't that daring: bitter greens (Swiss chard) and bacon (pancetta)--but I'm a half-bacon-fiend who's more than Swiss chard friendly, I went that route.

I made a couple of changes to the recipe--instead of baby spinach, I used grown up spinach (I'm beginning an antipathy for baby veggies--apart from the price, I'm increasingly unconvinced of their flavour) and my dining companion has a citrus allergy, so I didn't use the lemon rind, but to add the teeniest bit of sharpness used a about a quarter tsp of white wine vinegar.

It was a pretty effortless affair and the recipe came together in a rather quick fashion--I think I had dinner on the table within about -45 minutes, from start of prep to dishing out the pasta. To keep it as a one-pot dish, I crisped the bacon in the cooking pot, removed the pieces, but kept the fat in the pot when whisking the flour into Ahe milk. The flavour was pretty good--it would definitely benefit from a bay leaf and the bacon should be manditory--tried it without and it didn't work for me or my friend...and if you aren't making your own stock and like me used an insta-boullion, you may want to keep the bacon fat in the dish because of the lovely all-over depth it added to the dish.


cheers!
jasmine