09 January 2008

New Year...

...new beginnings...

Hello everyone. I trust your holidays--sacred or secular--have you safe, happy and well-fed.

It's been ages since I last wrote to you. I'm not going to bore or trouble you with the intimate details of my existence as a widow without consideration these last five and a half months, except to say that although transparent meanness and opportunism still thrive, kindness, although plentiful, can still surprise you in the most unexpected places.

Over the past half-year or so I've received hundreds of messages, either in email, voicemail, cards, visits or messages on this site. Thank you all so much for your thoughts, wishes and prayers. I've also received many notes from people waiting patiently for my return. I've thought of you and this site often, but I knew I wouldn't be able to return until my life settled a bit--thank you for your patience.

I wish I could tell you that I found solace in the kitchen. Unfortunately, as many know, you can tell what my mood is by the food I cook. After a particularly bad batch of brownies, my Dear Little Mummy said "You're just too sad to cook."

To be honest, I tended to avoid the kitchen in any meaningful way. I couldn't even look at cookbooks or read any of my favourite food writers or bloggers. I couldn't even watch cooking shows (but I now have several hours of Jamie Oliver and Heston Blumenthal on the PVR).

The only thing I could make with any degree of competency was jam--pretty simple: stir, stir, stir, boil, boil, boil, stir, stir, stir and pour...and eat.

I am happy to say that my scullery, while not in full buzz, now sings more often with the happy blurblings and sizzlings that marks a proper, working home kitchen. The dish that put me back on track? Nigella's Easy Sticky Toffee Pudding (more on that later).

I don't know how things will go and I will ease back into blogging. I hope to pick up my Savour the Season series in the next few weeks and probably figure out a theme or two....but right now, I'm just pleased to be back.


cheers!
jasmine

24 comments:

glamah16 said...

Welcome back! I found your blog last summer and was so sorry to read about your loss. I was so happy to see your post pop up in my reader. Take your time as grief and mourning have no set timeframes.Eventually it will all come together.

Sarah Caron said...

Welcome back. Ease yourself back into it...we are just happy to hear from you.

K & S said...

It will take some time, just give yourself some. Take care and lots of hugs.

Lydia said...

Welcome back, Jasmine. I hope this new year will be one of healing and regeneration. The kitchen, it seems from my own experience, is always a good place to start.

Quellia said...

Welcome Home Jasmine. You have been thought of often, and missed.

Mama Squirrel said...

I like the cheerful bees! I thought of you yesterday when I met a person in the toy store in B-village who was looking for an Indian food store right around there, somebody had told her there was one nearby; I was a bit stumped on that one so I hope she found what she was looking for. I thought if she'd gone to the Old K.C. she could have at least gotten some samosas. ;-)

Take care.

SusanV said...

It's so good to see you're back. You've been in my thoughts often during these past months.

Alice Q. said...

Hi Jasmine! Good to hear from you, we've missed you! I think I understand about the kitchen, it will be waiting for you when you're ready though - no need to rush things. Hope you are otherwise doing well.

Meeta said...

Good to have you back Jasmine. I for one am looking forward to everything and anything you offer. Wishing you my warmest for 2008!

Kalyn said...

Hi Jasmine,
I've thought of you many times and hoped you were going to get to a place where you would feel like blogging again, since to me that would be a sign that you were starting to heal. I know you can't ever completely get over a loss of this magnitude, but I do hope you can get back to enjoying some of your passions again. Great to see this post pop up in the feed reader. Best wishes.

The Old Foodie said...

Welcome back Dear Jasmine.

MyKitchenInHalfCups said...

Welcome Home Jasmine.

jerry said...

Welcome back Jasmine

I've thought about you often in the past few months, and I'm glad to find you well.

Anything you need, just reach out and touch me. It's yours.

From my family to you, all our love and best wishes.

Annemarie said...

I also found your blog last year and really felt for you when I read about your loss. I can't imagine it's easy, but it's good to see a post from you again and hear that you're slowly getting back into things. Hope you have many, many more of the surprising kindnesses you mentioned.

Diane said...

I am happy you are back, but do continue to take what time and comfort you need for yourself. I know what you mean about your emotions coming out in the cooking - when I am sad or angry I find the food fails. Or I cut off the tip of my finger. Or I just don't want to eat it.

Share with us what you can when you can - I'm so glad to see you back!

Shaun said...

Jasmine, honey ~ I often think of you and am glad to see that you're taking small steps back into the world of blogging. For those of us who don't have the luxury of being able to stop by to offer you a hug, a muffin, a roast, or a bottle of wine, this post is a relief. No one expects you to bounce right back - ever - but it is good that you are finding inspiration to carry on with it all. I've missed you. xx P.S. Do tell - What is Savour the Season?

CollyWolly said...

Welcome back dearest Jasmine, I have missed you and prayed for you. It is so good to see you back here in your space again. I like that you are being wise and pacing yourself, That is a good thing to do. I pray this year will be a year of renewing and healing for you and I am so looking forward to seeing what you will be feeding us! Hugs & Luv from Colleen

Bibi Move said...

Thanks for coming back!
YUPI!

Andrea said...

Welcome back, Jasmine. You've been through a lot, and like Kalyn I take this post as a good sign that some of your pain is easing and you are coming back to the world. Take your time. We'll be here.

Canadian Baker said...

Glad to see you back Jasmine!

Jasmine said...

Hello all

Thanks so much for the warm welcome back. It's good to see so many old friends and new ones here.

Mama Squirrel--Good call recommending OKC--I'd probably have sent them to the downtown spice store.

Shaun--Savour the Season was a what's growing locally series I started last year...only got one or two posts in...

j

Anonymous said...

I'm so happy to read you again!!After losing my so young mom just 2 months ago, the only thing that helps me a bit right now is reading all of you and watching the lovely photos.
Wish you the best year!

Sil BsAs

kenna said...

i hope you find your healing - whether it be in food or elsewhere in the heart. you're amazing for sharing this with your readers, and i, for one, thank you.

Lyra said...

It is wonderful to have you back. I didn't realize you were back in the blogging game again until I saw your comment about Ozzy the purple haired neighbor on Brilynn's site. It is great to read your new posts, and to see you join us in the delicious glories of spring.(well, maybe not quite yet up in Canada).