10 July 2008

I'll never be a professional deep fat fry gal

...well, not a this rate.

At issue was a recipe for the next cookery book review. When I saw the recipe for (bloobybloobybloo) I thought--hey, I like the name and it could be tasty because it uses (falalalala) and (bingobongobing). The technique was easy enough: deep fat fry a dumpling.

I'm not afraid of much, culinarily: fugu's the only thing that readily comes to mind. If it's prepared by someone who knows what they're doing, I'll probably be fine...I just don't want to be the one scalpelling away the tetrodotoxin-laden liver and skin and other bits, and then spend the next how many hours worried if I'll ever hear from my friends again.

There are those amongst us who are afraid of one thing or another in the kitchen: yeast, whizzy whirry bladed machines, recipes that require cooking (as opposed to dumping and nuking), spices you can't find at the bigscarymegamart, spices you can find at the bigscarymegamart, using a mandolin without the hand guard, butter...

I know from trawling blogs that deep fat frying isn't necessarily everyone's favourite activity. I'm not sure what it is that bothers some people. Is it the searing hot oil, reminiscent of Mediaeval torture? It is a worry that the inside will be a playground for salmonella while the outside is a beautifully and crisp golden brown? Maybe it's because it uses f-words...two of them...preceded by a d-word.

By no means am I a well-practiced hand at deep fat frying. About once every few months I decide that something needs to be dffed--doughnuts, cutlets, whatevers--and I just do it. Most of the time things are fine, but sometimes my issue is that the end result is a little overdone. Instead of a lovely golden hue reminiscent of a setting sun, it's a burnished honey-cum-blowtorch kissed charcoal briquette. It's usually one or three of a recipe load of goodies, so it's no big deal.

My problem with the (bloobybloobybloo) was that I didn't seal the wrapper edges well enough. A couple of minutes after lowering them into the bubbling fat the spluttering started an all of a sudden my dumplings weren't alone in the pot. They were surrounded by lace-like confetti that emanated from my improperly-sealed dumplings. When all was said and done, I must have lost a good 20 per cent of my fillings from my dumplings. Not enough to render the dumplings hollow shells, but enough to make me sigh.

Then again, dffed (falalalala) is pretty good in its own right.

Still, I don't think I'm quite ready to be a professional deep fat fry gal...yet.



cheers!
jasmine





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10 comments:

Jenny said...

My that looks familiar - rather like what was left when I attempted zucchini sticks but it didn't work. Still tasty though.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I have to be in a special mood. You know the *highly confident, annoyingly cheery, I can do no wrong* mood. Which probably hits me once a month.
I keep saying that it's because I don't have a fryer, but somehow I think I must have a defect at the molecular level. Sigh.

Anonymous said...

My culinary fear is electric meat slicers. I'm down right phobic about them. Deep frying, sugar pulling, yeast - no problem. But meat slicers? They give me serious nightmares.

Deborah said...

My husband bought me a deep fat fryer for Christmas, and it makes the frying so much easier. But when I have to pan fry something - totally different story!

Kristen said...

Oh, just regular ol' frying makes me nervous. My cooking skills are rather limited to begin with, yes, but frying? No, thanks. That's what my boyfriend's for. ;)

glamah16 said...

Frying isnt my forte either. I have respect for those fast food fryers.

Deetsa said...

I'm sorry I missed the Canada Day stuff... I wish I'd had more time.

I totally relate to the frying situation. I too have not sealed properly and suffered lacy food and icky floaties on the oil.

Is this your worst fry situation or have you had worse? I must say mine was chocolate wonton purses. The result of some amounted to bathroom-humor and my very upset potty-mouth.

Anonymous said...

If at first you don't succeed...

I don't know how good I am at deep frying because frying anything is a rarity for me, but when necessary, I can fry chicken, fish and fries quite well on the stove top! :)~

Alice Q. Foodie said...

I don't mind frying, but I can't cook rice. Is that weird? I also can't make pie crusts.

MyKitchenInHalfCups said...

I guess I'm bad, I just love the crumbly crispy things. Why should it hold together.